Mom Limerick Poems - Limerick Poems and Poets

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Written by Winged Warrior
Categories: christmas, parents, romantic,

Seducing Santa

I saw mom and Santa having a chat
She told him he was much too fat
She then grabbed his behind
With eyes closed kissed him blind
Then they both fell on the mat





Nov.17.2019
Holiday Themed Limerick
Sponsored by: Tania Kitchin

N/A for contest

Written by Larry Belt
Categories: funny

Poke It!!!

Her mom has a wart on her face that grows
How that thing got there nobody knows
I looked to my wife and said
"Poke it, I think that its dead"
She said, "Stop it!, that thing is her nose"

Written by Rico Leffanta
Categories: humor,

Sex Education For Kids

A day at the zoo can be tough
As animals tend to play rough
So mom said, "Whoa!
Its time to go!"
When bull elephants did some stuff

Written by Frank Mashina
Categories: family, humor, marriage, social,

Mom’s Photo Secret

Mom said, “No sex before marriage,”
With rules she thought were quite sage.
But in her wedding shot,
I see a twist in the plot—
Was her vow just a part of the age?

Written by Thabang Ngoma
Categories: fathers day, golf, memory,

Golf Day This Dad

You drove the ball high
It flew and touched the sky
I heard, “FORE!"
And ducked therefore
But the ball hit my thigh


Some of the things mom never knew happened;-)

Written by Barbara Gorelick
Categories: childhood, sports

Little League

He looked so darned small at the plate
For the pitch he just couldn't wait
Got a high fast ball
He swung for the wall
You'r out! But to mom he did great!


For the Favorite Sport contest....

Written by John Trusty
Categories: funny, satire

Whine On Mogen David Wine

Mom used to drink this wine for a tonic,
I had no idea she meant a colonic.
So I snuck some of this swill,
moved more than an EX LAX pill
cause the gas sounds were quite polyphonic!


Written 6/22/2011 for the ‘Bottle of Wine” contest

Written by Panya Chanthavong
Categories: baby, father son, kids, girl, love, mom, son,

The Only Girl

Hey Son, I wrote this to warn you
In your whole life, many girls are coming through 
You might have only girl to love her much over
But you have to remember that do not hurt your mother
She is my only girl too...

Written by Anna Hopper
Categories: fish, humorous,

Sushi

Mom adores when I do the dishes
If I don't, I'll swim with the fishes
Then my mama will win
She'll never cook again
She'll eat sushi that is delicious

Written by Ralph Taylor
Categories: childhood, family

Randa's Little Bears

It's a picture of Lucas and me.

We're cuties you have to agree.

     The love that we share

     with our Mom "Randa Bear",

is in the smile on my face that you see.


Poet: Ralph Taylor  5/2/11
Contest:  Brotherly Love

Written by Joyce Johnson
Categories: funny

Burlesque

My naive picture of Burlesque
Some lovely ladies junoesque
Slapstick humor risky
Dancers rather frisky.
Mom would consider it grotesque.

For Miranda's contest

won an hm

Written by Nyonglema Pisoh
Categories: baby, family, mom, mother, mother daughter, my child, my children,

New Life

Hiding in mummy's tummy, kicking happily away
 I'm kissing you warmly, clapping and singing in play
 They say in a few weeks
 I'll be able to kiss  your new cheeks
 I can't wait for the morning I'll lift you in a sway

(c) Nyonglema

Written by Jack Ellison
Categories: fun,

Soccer Mom Ninja

If you ever meet up with a soccer mom ninja
Watch you don't cross her or she'll chop your chinchilla
Vicious and surly
This dangerous girlie
Avoid her at all costs or call in the militia

Written by Vladimir Tumanov
Categories: humor, humorous, philosophy, political, society,

Confucius

To be truly and deeply Confucian,
we don’t need a refined constitution.
Just obey mom and dad.
Choose the good — not the bad.
Serve the Emperor, S/shun revolution.

Written by James Fraser
Categories: funny, word play, words, writing,

Conversation Overheard For Jan's Limerick


I heard he gave her a rogering
Rogers mom said totally disgusting
Conversation overheard
No wonder she's disturbed
He actually gave her Rogers Ring

Written by Randy Steele
Categories: children, funny, mother

One Way Or Another

Actions speak louder than words
A saying I thought was absurd
Till Mom showed the way
If I don’t obey
The paddle tells things went unheard

Written by Andrew Crisci
Categories: food, mother, me,

A Bowl of Lucky Charms

Mom, give me a bowl of Lucky Charms,
I'll grow as you raise my arms...
see a taller me,
or much sillier me.
Mom, get me more of those Lucky Charms!

Written by Rajat Kanti Chakrabarty
Categories: fun, funny,

Patricia

Patricia dawdled through the breakfast
Mom got angry, sent her to Belfast
There she learnt how to run
And how to eat a bun
And returned with the bread crumbs amassed

Written by Joshua Lacey
Categories: angst,

Silent Threat


Think Mom dumb?
Fear makes numb!
Fink Cupid's arrow
Fly like sparrow
Why succomb?

Written by Rajat Kanti Chakrabarty
Categories: fun,

Limerick For Sullivan

I paced as the coffee brewed
To one spot Sully stayed glued
"Dad where is my mom?"
She was held in Guam
Because her pug nose was skewed