Written by
Terry Flood
Categories:
christmas, humorous,
Santas Home
Santa came home with a reindeer
And Mrs Claus said with a sneer
‘Did you have to bring
That horny old thing?’
Rudolph said, ‘Madam, he lives here.’
13 December 2021
For: I Need A Good Laugh: Xmas Limerick Contest
Sponsor: Andrea Dietrich
Written by
Jan Allison
Categories:
christmas, humorous,
You Must Look After Your Elf
Santa’s little helper felt poorly sick
Couldn’t deliver presents for Saint Nick
His red nose was gleaming
Blue eyes they were streaming
I hope that Santa will give him some Vick
24th December 2014
Written by
Duke Beaufort
Categories:
business, funny, holiday, philosophy, time,
December 21, 2012
The world as we know it will end!
This warning the Mayans did send
But yes there's still time
After reading this rhyme
To honor Black Friday and spend
Written by
Jack Horne
Categories:
clothes,
Fishing Tackle Tm
The trousers he's wearing are Wrangler -
they're great for his job as an angler
(although on a trip
he busted his zip
and showed all those present his dangler).
written 6th December for Sara's Trademark contest
Written by
Constance La France
Categories:
silly,
Bored In Manhattan
I went to Manhattan cause I was bored,
And it is there, I met a man, sweet Lord;
Oh gosh, he was enchanting,
And soon he had me panting;
And adored, my word, bored has a reward.
___________________
December 28, 2015
Limerick
~ Not For Contest ~
Written by
Bryn Strudwick
Categories:
snow,
Frozen Joe
FROZEN JOE/
A hardy young fellow called Joe
Went out with no clothes in the snow
Certain bits turned to ice
And then snapped off – not nice
So he now spells his name J-o
30th December 2020
Winter Snow or Ice contest
Sponsor - Tania Kitchin
Written by
Geoffrey Brewer
Categories:
humor,
Upside Down
UPSIDE DOWN SNOWMAN
With a world upside down you discover
New perspectives, I feel a Wild rover
Makes my senses run free
Ah! But now need a pee
So would you mind turning me over
23 December 2017
Written by
Gail Debole
Categories:
friendship, people,
Portrait of Gena
Written by Gail DeBole on December 20, 2011
Updated on March 14, 2020
Miss Gena loves all purple things
No matter what her day might bring.
She loves purple clothes...
Has oodles of those -
And also wears quite fancy rings.
Part of the Portrait Poetry Collection
Written by
Drjim Martin
Categories:
funny,
A New Ford
A New Ford
DrJames EMartin
©December, 2012
The lad had wished for a new Ford.
He found one he really adored.
But trouble arose,
With the one he chose,
He found that he could not afford.
Written by
Drjim Martin
Categories:
life,
A Good Day
A Good Day
DrJames EMartin
©December, 2012
The day is going to be good.
This thought is well understood.
No need for worry
Nor running from things furry
That monster is made out of wood.
Written by
Adam Wheaton
Categories:
funny
My Attempt At a Limerick
the neighbor's grass is always greener
and their house is always cleaner
but just remember
that come December
their family won't be any leaner
Written by
Poet. Undertaker
Categories:
humor,
Extempore
Once there was a writer by name Jacob Distemper,
fellow is no doubt an excellent writer,extempore.
Children’s jungle story writing!
all time adult poem writing!
bloody, who caresWhat margin this December?
Written by
Anne-Lise Andresen
Categories:
cute love, fun, happy, sunshine,
- Maggie, Old Granny -
The lady Maggie we remember
Carl met her in December
Small and round.but classy
Sexy.sometimes sassy
Old granny her mind's in a blender
08.03.2018
Sun :) - A-L Andresen :)
Written by
Howard Tunick
Categories:
humor,
A Rising Tide For Contest
There once was a climate change doubter
He really was quite a shouter
Until late one night
The high tide just right
Found the beach house he loved under water
24 December 2015
Written by
Drjim Martin
Categories:
jobs, life,
The New Job
The New Job
DrJames EMartin
©December, 2012
He started his job at six,
He was ready to enter the mix.
He lost it as seven,
Not his view of heaven,
So now it is back to the sticks.
Written by
Drjim Martin
Categories:
patriotic,
High Flying Flag
High Flying Flag
DrJames EMartin
©December, 2012
The flag was perched aright
It was properly lit at night.
It drew many views,
Was daily in the news,
Till it vanished from everyone’s sight.
Written by
Drjim Martin
Categories:
funny,
Christmas Joy
Christmas Joy
DrJames EMartin
©December, 2012
Was asked if Christmas was good,
Particularly in my neighborhood.
Responded that it was fine,
A pocket full of bills is now mine,
Maybe soon I’ll be singing as I should.
Written by
Ralph Sergi
Categories:
humorous,
Such a Pail
Such a pail
I have a sweet beautiful daughter
Who is always fetching me water
Each day without fail
she has such a pail
When my daughter brings me the water
Limerick Contest December 24, 2015
Sponsored by Jan Allison
Written by
Drjim Martin
Categories:
funny, day,
Gloomy Day
Gloomy Day
DrJames EMartin
©December, 2012
The day looks gloomy and dark.
Not a good day for the park.
So inside I will stay,
No time to play,
Time for me to make my mark.
Written by
Dane Ann Smith-Johnsen
Categories:
funny
An Unusual New Year's Resolve
There once was a woman that was very fat!
Her diet resolves, I fear,
Broken each and every year.
Until she put something new under her hat –
It was her food; now, what do you think of that?
© December 22, 2010
Dane Smith-Johnsen
Written by
Richard Breese
Categories:
car, december, destiny, drink, giggle, humor, silly,
the first rudolph
once an old cabbie named fred
had a nose that glowed bright red
when a call from a bar
put an elf in his car
and now he leads santas sled.
Written by
Jan Allison
Categories:
christmas, humorous,
It's Snow Joke
Poor Rudolph’s desperate to “go”
Resulting in bright yellow snow
He produces some brown
Making Santa Claus frown
And shouting Rudolph, No! No! No!
A Funny Christmas or December Holiday Limerick Poetry Contest
Sponsored by Tania Kitchin
12/02/22
Written by
Jack Ellison
Categories:
winter,
Absolute Torture
It's December 21st and the days are getting longer
Won't be long before this damn winter is conquered
Had one too many
That's more than plenty
At my ripe old age each one's absolute torture
© Jack Ellison 2016
Written by
Jack Ellison
Categories:
winter,
In the Buff
It's December 19th and still no white stuff
This ole earth has decided enough is enough
We're messing things up
Sitting here on our butts
Soon Canadians will be walking around in the buff
© Jack Ellison 2015
Written by
Lin Lane
Categories:
funny,
Life Is Such a Bummer-For Contest
I knew I had to call a plumber
but he was busy 'til next summer
Now I have no loo.
What am I to do?
Well poop - my life is such a bummer!
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
December 22nd 2015
For Limerick Contest-Sponsor: JAN ALLISON