Limerick Poems
Poem Details | by Duke Beaufort |
Categories: humor, language,

It's a wonderful wife

Her Italian has a mystique
My wife can three languages speak
With English hooray
She has a cachet!
Though her Crochet texts mimic Greek

Poem Details | by Tony Hargreaves |
Categories: child abuse,

PREDATORY PRIEST

A new priest arrived at their church.
In the pulpit he stands to preach
About moral standards.
His flock accept his words.
Young girls he then would groom and teach.




Poem Details | by Duke Beaufort |
Categories: 2nd grade, boy, bullying, food, money, perspective,

'D'isgraceful 'O'bnoxious 'G'rotesque 'E'litists

DOGE boys Musk and Ramaswamy
Box their cold cuts with pastrami
They soon will behold
While napkins can fold
Budgets are not origami

Poem Details | by Josehf Murchison |
Categories: animal, art, fun, light, magic,

Strawberry Snails Forever

Strawberry Snails Forever There once was a strawberry pink snail. She was sweet from her nose to her tail. She crossed over the moss. Never stopping or cross. Eating bits growing out of the shale. By Josehf Lloyd Murchison

Poem Details | by Gershon Wolf |
Categories: change, dance, humor, leadership,

At the Inaugural Ball

   Trump asked, ‘Ms. Harris, How ‘bout the next dance?’
   Ms. Harris agreed, as if in a trance
      Her feet were so light
      Trump swung her way right ~
   And then she begged him to live in the Manse!


Poem Details | by Charles Messina |
Categories: humor,

Shafted

I was hoping for a little bit of tit 
She was hoping for a little bit of tat 
But when she turned 'round 
My balls hit the ground 
Because she was a he...with a bat

Poem Details | by Robert L. Hinshaw |
Categories: happy, political,

Happy New Year America

Happy New Year friends, let us jubilate

   We gave Joe the boot, now let's celebrate

      Happy days are here again

         At last we are free of pain

            Thank goodness, Joe's no longer chief of state

Poem Details | by Jim Healey |
Categories: christmas, humor,

Canadian Elf

A sprite little pixie from Guelph
has made quite a name for herself.
She took a long stroll
up to the North Pole.
Now she's Santa's Canadian elf.

Poem Details | by John Read |
Categories: age,

Old Age

Growing old is not a big deal 
Your only has old as you feel 
Age you'll find 
Is all in the mind 
It's those aches and pains that are real.

Poem Details | by Duke Beaufort |
Categories: anger, evil, math, murder,

tip of the iceberg

Three hot shots unlike normal men
Form and fill this diagram Venn:
Luigi the threat
Forms an ivied set
With Elon + Don from U Penn

Poem Details | by Duke Beaufort |
Categories: rights, together, wisdom,

rights come with borders

An act-as-they-wish guarantee
Leads brutes to think they’ll tread on me
But I too have rights
And might eschew fights
If backed by a fair referee

Poem Details | by Duke Beaufort |
Categories: mother, nature,

she gets the last word

She’ll scream like hell I’m your mother!
And introject There’s no other!
But your disrespect
Means all must expect
We’re nature’s target to smother

Poem Details | by Jo Chamberlain |
Categories: humor,

Christmas Cheer

Rudolph's eyes were as huge as his belly he couldn't step away from the deli the rumbling started soon after he farted now his friends call him smelly Nelly

Poem Details | by Melani Udaeta |
Categories: dance, emotions, feelings, music,

Misfit Figurine

Marvelous ancient music box,
prim guitarist on pointe shoes rocks;
A misfit figurine
not concerned how she’s seen;
Her erratic tempo is not Bach’s.

Poem Details | by Duke Beaufort |
Categories: evil, horror, irony, money, obituary,

pyramids 21st century style

2025’s manuscript
Tips off the rip-offs as we’re gypped!
When oligarchs die
They'll not greed deny
But flip us the bird from their crypt

Poem Details | by Gershon Wolf |
Categories: chanukah, christmas, giggle, nostalgia,

Santa in Mayberry

     Santa Claus sure is fine, and he’s dandy
     On Chanukah he gives out the candy

         He wants to light the lights
         But instead starts a fight

     In Mayberry that job falls to Andy



Poem Details | by Gershon Wolf |
Categories: food, money, sick,

'A' is for 'Awful,' 'C' is for 'Cookie'

   Once I ate a defective Oreo
   I’d imported from Lower Borneo
       I’d spent too much money
       My stomach felt funny
   Then my 'plumbing' gave it the old heave-ho



    

Poem Details | by Beryl Edmonds |
Categories: christmas, miracle,

The Miraculous Sky Dive

Soon festive time will arrive To remind us that Christ’s alive Celebrate the birth With much joy and mirth Praise the miraculous sky dive.

Poem Details | by Duke Beaufort |
Categories: anger, power,

KP's duty goes beyond potato peeling

The savings could social work buy
Yet Defund Police we won't try
That plan seemed too rash
But Trump’s agent Kash
Would trash and defund FBI

Poem Details | by Duke Beaufort |
Categories: death, environment, funeral, humanity, humor, mental health, natural disasters,

007 over-the-edge

Brit's spy guy from Ian Fleming
Is Bond who goes chaos stemming!
When the web of life slumps
See how quickly he jumps 
Sadly to die like a lemming 

Poem Details | by David Crandall |
Categories: thanksgiving day,

Thanksgiving Reflections

I gave thanks for everything on my plate,
but in my paradoxical state, 
I deeply regret
everything that I "et"
or is the pronunciation "ate"?

Poem Details | by Robert L. Hinshaw |
Categories: how i feel, political,

Good Riddance

Good riddance to you Kamala and Joe

   You both caused chaos adding to our woe

      Your years of utter nonsense

         Left us all bereft and tense

            Adios, I'm happy to see you go

Poem Details | by Duke Beaufort |
Categories: abuse, bullying, environment, money,

the mars man

Musk has deployed a mother lode
Trump’s tariffs can't ever erode!
His influence gift 
Means we get short shrift
And Earth is his private commode   

Poem Details | by Jan Allison |
Categories: books, humorous, writing,

Toilet Humour and Risque Rhymes - new book


Loo humour it is my forte Risqué rhymes, I’ll write night and day I’ve finished next book Will you dare to look It’s naughty – that’s all I will say!

Poem Details | by Lunarya Mornelithe |
Categories: analogy, angst, dream, heart, introspection, literature, voyage,

A Tin Can’s Lament

There once was a man made of tin,
Whose joints made a horrible din.
“I need oil,” he’d plea,
“Or a heart, possibly,
But rust ruins romance again!”

Poem Details | by Duke Beaufort |
Categories: addiction, money,

how to feel good in the USA

Though urges could empty a vault
Obsession to splurge cannot halt!
Surge spending can’t pause
Ending it might cause
Our mental gestalt to default

Poem Details | by Lise Clendening |
Categories: sin, spiritual,

Broken

The world, like the sink, is broken.
Our spirits find ways, unspoken.
Washing away our sins,
Saving all souls within,
Eyes opened, and finally awoken.

Poem Details | by Timothy Clark |
Categories: 10th grade, 11th grade, 12th grade, allegory, allusion, imagination,

AM i holding up

my cracks make me feel like a crank 
not being able to hold water runs me insane
All i needed was a handyman
instead of being rigged until i leak again
im just a broken sink

Poem Details | by Timothy Clark |
Categories: 10th grade, 11th grade, 12th grade, anxiety, black love, depression, dream,

Dream

They think with only using words
How are they ever heard
no wisdom and willing to move without reason
they chisel away at what we call freedom
does that sound like a dream deferred?

Poem Details | by Aniruddha Pathak |
Categories: humor, life, school,

If ignorance is instantaneous

Why waste time at school and still miss the bus
When ignorance is instantaneous!
In this school we call life,
The best teacher seems strife
That gives great lessons, makes none whatso fuss.
__________________________
Tongue-in-cheek |17.11.2024|humour, school, life

Poem Details | by Julianne Williams |
Categories: character, imagination,

The wizard of Oz

Close my eyes, home I feel 
I cannot be dreaming, dreams aren't this real 
Ruby red shoes, three clicks of the heel
I will never forget how they all helped me heal 
My friend made of straw and the other Tin steel 

 


Poem Details | by David Crandall |
Categories: silly,

Mad Cow Expertise

Mad cow disease is my expertise,
and I dine on fine wine, quince and cheese.
In my august wisdom, 
what I sure think is dumb, 
is to spit without checking the breeze.

Poem Details | by Subimal Sinha-Roy |
Categories: humorous,

She Outdid Humbug Wizadry


Toto uncurtained Oz's stagey play,
his humbug wizardry didn't go astray.
      In a balloon he vanished,
      lone Dorothy felt banished,
on silver shoes she flew home all the way.

Poem Details | by James Friske |
Categories: water, work,

Plumbing

Excellence in plumbing leaves me numb
Mastery in apprenticeship of thumbs
A Dearth of splash guards
Replaced with glass shards
Invites me to leave instead of come

Poem Details | by Nia Tunduwani |
Categories: fun,

A ridiculous question

She says witches are ugly if bad
She's says like it some kind of new fad
Which makes me think
Did this princess in pink
Called me ugly and now I am sad